I'm joining many of you.
I'm glad to be. I know many of those who read this blog are in transition. I never realized it, but it's true. I don't know if it's the stage of life we're in, or maybe I attract transient folk. But there is transition in most people's lives.
Is it in mine?
Lately I've had this unsettling feeling of being, well, unsettled. It's not an emotional unsettling; I'm not worried about it. But I feel like things are changing.
To understand this feeling you'd have to have my history. Throughout my life there have been times where I started to feel disconnected from my current situation, only to find out soon after that I was to be somewhere else. It took me to Judson. To Northern. To new jobs. New churches. New places.
I'm having that feeling.
But, why? I'm not graduating for another year. My job is going okay. (I think... that's another post.) Although, realistically I don't know that my voice can handle the serving thing much longer. (I'm planning on seeing an ENT once this infection clears.) Living Hope still seems to be a good fit. The apartment works well here.
So... why this feeling of transition?
Maybe it's a longing for transition. I thought I would be done here a year ago. Instead I have a year to go. I don't mind, it's just not what I thought. And I can only serve tables for so long. The voice is a convenient excuse to push me on to other possibilities. What? I have no clue.
Maybe I'm ready for something different. For a change.
Or maybe I'm just jealous of all of you who are tossing in the uncertainties of life.
5 comments:
I would like to take turn of settling into the certainties of life instead. But I don't see it in my near future.
Hope you discover your transition, and that it's inspiring!
Erin - Yay! You're so back. :)
I've been at that place, too, wondering where my feet would land, or if they ever would. It's nice to have an idea of where things will end up a week, 6 months, a year later.
But once they've been settled for a while, it's time to upset the apple cart. (I have no idea why someone would want to upset an apple cart, but you know what I mean.)
I hope I discover that transition, too. It's been a ride so far. I'm looking forward to the next turn. :)
i hate apples, so i would upset that apple cart...i think you need to remove yourself for a while in order for you to see what is the next step you need to take
Anna - You hate apples?? Seriously? Wow.
How would I remove myself? That sounds like an idea, but what would it look like?
Honestly, I've considered it. I can't help but think I'm better off remaining in the situation, because when I think of backing out of it, I can't envision gaining any new information. Then again, maybe once I'm outside I would get that info...
yes, i do not eat apples as a matter of fact: no that is a lie : i will eat an apple once in a very super extra rare blue moon (maybe once a year b/c someone offers me something with apples)
i am a very odd person to begin with though
Dan - what works for me sometimes is physically removing myself from someone or some place or something for a while (a day, a week, whatever you choose)...just to clear myself from anything and everything that is in that particular situation...it gives me a chance to reflect on my life...it is at that time where i see that God is helping me open wide the doors that were slightly ajar...
STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP!!!
"I can't help but think I'm better off remaining in the situation, because when I think of backing out of it, I can't envision gaining any new information." stop thinking about the possibility of what you may gain because that is exactly what is holding you back...you are afraid of what you might not gain therefore you dont even want to try, so stop
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