Could someone tell me, where is love? ‘cause I haven’t found her yet
They say you find it in your heart, well my chest is up for rent
It’s one-bedroom, but it’s got just space enough
And it’s lovely, though the neighborhood is rough
Where is love?
But no tenant means no rent, and no payment makes one poor
But now things are looking better, in my heart’s economy
And I’m hoping someone needs a place to stay
From the floor to the ceiling this heart’s been healing, not revealing it was wrecked before
I wanna let love in; [take the hinges off the door]
If it’s gonna let love in
Let love in
La di da di da di da, but I’m free of him at last
Now I’m not sure of the condition, of all that’s left behind
But I’ll fix it up to make a home inside
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I'm mainly stuck on that last verse. I like the rest. And the chorus can't be done until the music is finished being written. Maybe something about kicking him out? And transitioning the idea of lines 1 & 2 to 3 &4 would be helpful. I'm just not sure how to get there.
7 comments:
"This place was haunted by a ghost, but I'm free of him at last//(I) Opened up the windows, and the breeze cleared out his past."
"This place was haunted by a ghost, but I'm free of him, I'm free//(I) Opened up the windows, and caught my breath in a new breeze."
"This place was haunted by a ghost, hung like an odor in the room//(I) Opened up the windows, in came the scent of something new."
Adam - that third one has the most potential in my book! I'll see what I can do with it.
"But even her packed up and left, and I'm free of him at last..."
It's a little more...extreme, as far as the loneliness feeling goes, but maybe...
VJ - I'm thinking that was "HE packed up and left," not "her." And I like it! I need to post incomplete lyrics more often. You guys are great!
Look at all the fun I miss when I leave the country! You've probably finished the song by now since Adam and VJ had great suggestions, but I have to add my two cents.
This place was haunted by a ghost, a phantom from the past/But I finally evicted him, and I’m free of him at last.
Anders - Yep, it's been a while!
All - This is where I'm at so far:
This heart was darkened like a tomb
Staleness clogged the air
Light and freshness now blow through
To resurrect the disrepair
I'm not sure the condition
Of what's been left behind
But I'll fix it up to make a home inside
Thoughts?
LOVE the rewrite. Well done.
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